Today’s Reason To Drink

Dear Santa,

Can we push Christmas back a few more weeks? Or possibly just cancel it this year? I’ve got no money and no time to go shopping. No holiday spirit. No good will for all men. I don’t even want to part with the few pennies I have in my pocket to silence those bell-ringers. You see, Christmas snuck up on me this year. I was in a paranoid state, so I accidently shot it. And your reindeer … well, I warned them to stay outta my yard. Why not join me at the Back Door on the 25th, and we’ll toast to the recession. You’re buying.

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