So the weirdest thing happened last night. No, I didn’t get asked out on a date, and I didn’t lose 5 pounds, but thanks for asking, jerk. I was in my closet picking out clothes for the next day when I heard something hard and small drop on the floor. I moved my shoes around to see what it was … I thought it might be a quarter that fell out of one of my folded pants pockets … but it was my toe ring that I lost in the Atlantic Ocean a few months ago!! Seriously! I had hopped out of our boat to help a man look for his wedding ring, because the ocean current was so strong, and when I got back in the boat, my toe ring had come off. And last night, it literally fell out of the sky … in my closet.
I’m not sure what this means. But I’m wondering if I can request a few other things I’ve lost recently — like my pink flask, or my earring from Asheville, or the $100 bucks I spent at the track. I will keep you updated if anything else reappears. For now I guess I will put the toe ring on and see what happens. Maybe something big and good and exciting is about to happen — like that date I was talking about earlier!