Help! Someone make me gay again!

I heard good things about a new dating app called Zoosk — sadly, that’s where my life is at the moment — so I downloaded it to try out. For some reason, it has categorized me as straight, and now I have all these dudes sending dick pics!

Help!!!!

I feel sorry for all straight women out there if this is really what happens on these apps. Let me just say lesbians do not send pics of their parts — who does that?

Also, I’ve reached out to Zoosk several times to get them to make me a lesbian — because there is no setting for it, sadly — and I feel like I’m stuck my 20s, pretending to flirt with dudes so I can get to the keg faster.

Dating apps are bullshit.